How long does it take you to hear from God?

Sometimes I think we say we are "waiting to hear from God" as an excuse as we dig our feet in the ground... or maybe as we just don't do anything.

I was taught there are 5 sources of wisdom: experience, wise counselors, facts, the Word (the Bible) & prayer (talking to God)

Here is one wise counselor you should take notes from...

I {heart} Bailey Marks.

Lord, please let me have faith like Bailey.

P.S. fun fact: our sweet Bailey Ebsen is named after Bailey Marks + Ney Bailey.  I'll explain why sometime, but you can probably figure out why yourself.  They are both my heroes. 

(Ney is author of Faith is Not a Feeling -- if you haven't read it, you MUST today. I implore you.)

"I would wear it everyday"

"If I gave you a sweater, and you loved it, I would know because you would wear it so much you'd be on the verge of wearing it out, because you loved it that much.  It would be the sweater you wear on Christmas and to get coffee and that you sleep in sometimes and that you drag around in the back of your car and tie around your waist.  It would start to smell like you, and it would get snags and get all stretched out, and just looking at it would make you tell a thousand stories of where it's been and who you've been in it.  

That's what I want my life to be, like a well-loved gift.  I think life, just life, just breathing in and out, is a great gift.  God gives us something amazing when he gives us life, and I want to live with gratitude.  I want to live in a way that shows how much I appreciate the gift.  If life were a sweater, I would wear it every day.  I wouldn't save it or keep it for a special occasion.  I would find every opportunity to wear that sweater, and I'd wear it proudly, shamelessly, for days on end.

...and I want my everyday to make God belly laugh, glad that he gave life to someone who loves the gift, who will use it up and wring it out and drag it around like a favorite sweater." 

Cold Tangerines, Shauna Niequist p 231-232, 235

I LOVE LOVE this book! If you haven't read it, it needs to be the next book you pick up! Seriously.  It literally played a big part in how I view my daily life.  And what I quoted above says it beautifully.

I want to celebrate today.  I want today to be the best day of my life.  Not yesterday.  Not that day 5 years ago.  Not waiting for tomorrow. Or the next.  But today.  

Today is the only day that I know I have.  Yesterday is gone.  Today is here, and I want to live it to it's fullest.  To enjoy every blessing.  To see this day the way God sees it. 

I have concluded that if today is going to be the best day of my life, I want to wear my favorite outfit. To wear it "proudly, shamelessly, for days on end." (Shauna Niequist)

So that leads me to my "sweater" -- right now for me, its my sweatshirt.

In my confusion of what my wardrobe actually is & what style I actually am... this is my favorite because it is the perfect combo of who I am.

Here's the how to:

 1. Buy a larger sweatshirt
(mine is an XL from Walmart -- fits boxy-- length is good in the arms + really wide, but not long- comes just bellow my belt-- which is what I wanted)

 2. Find + cut lace.
I had an old vintage tablecloth that I had found at a thrift store.

Here's what to do if you are cutting your own lace:
-find the 2 sections you want to use
-cut out your selection with fabric scissors -- mine are 10 in. length (5 in front, 5 in back) + 6 in. width
*I cut the inner edge by my neck straight, all other edges I cut around the pattern.
-run fabric glue around the edges with a q-tip (or your finger) to seal the edges from fraying

*If I were to do it again, I would find a thicker lace that is maybe even cut in the shape that I want -- I thought about using cloth doilies.

3.  Place the lace on the sweatshirt, pin it in place.  Then take a section at a time & glue it down with the fabric glue.  Make sure you do the edges well + places inside the middle of the pattern so that it stays flush on your sweatshirt (you don't want the center to be flopping around).  Press down as you go along. Let it dry & you are done!

*The fabric glue turned my lace a little yellowish, which is why I suggested to find a thicker lace -- I'm assuming it did that because it was old & thin.  So hopefully if you use a thick and/or newer one you will be fine! But I don't mind the yellowing anyways, it just makes it look even more vintage.

*PS I literally have worn it the past 3 days in a row since I made it.  

  

This is why.

* Disclaimer: Don't quote me on all this because THIS IS MY OPINION.  I personally have strongly concluded the following based on my research & experience-- but I love you & I urge YOU to do your own research & decide for yourself.  

I believe that there is a trifecta affecting each of our lives.  Each day I am convinced more & more of it's negative effects on us & I feel I must share it.  It involves the following:

1. What you put ON your body
2. What you put IN your body
3. What you DO

I also am convinced that we are whole people.  You can't pick parts of your life OR body & say that one does not effect the other.  That would be false.  With this belief, the trifecta is absolutely necessary to examine & make the appropriate changes.

Why?

Because if the following isn't you, it's probably someone you love.

I wonder if SOME (some -- not all -- we are each individuals with our own pasts & unique bodies with many different reasons why we could be dealing with the following) of the reasons why so many of us deal with depression, anxiety, doubt & stomach/digestion issues is due to this trifecta.  And that if we pursue healing in these 3 areas, the other areas that are affecting these issues will actually stand a chance to heal!

So this is why I believe what I do about this bad trifecta:

1.  What you put ON your body: 
In case you didn't know this already... the products you rub into your skin DAILY are filled with a bunch of bad chemicals that you can't even pronounce.  That means every day you are having toxic chemicals seep into your skin, into your bloodstream... SICK!  ...Apparently this is more dangerous than what you eat!! What goes into your skin affects your organs, your immune system & more.

* PRINT THIS:  EWG wallet guide

Article: Sodium Lauryl Sulfate: Facts verses Fairytales

EWG Skin Deep: * You can type in products & see how toxic they are or aren't!!!
"It's our mission at Environmental Working Group to use the power of information to protect human health and the environment. EWG's Skin Deep database gives you practical solutions to protect yourself and your family from everyday exposures to chemicals."  

EWG Tips for safe products  

EWG Skin Deep cosmetic guide

EWG Shoppers guide to pesticides in produce

2. What you put IN your body:
I hope I don't need to say much about this one. I'm sure you know enough to know that you need to eat right to be healthy.  But what you may not know is the crazy connection between your mind & gut.  When one's got issues, most likely so does the other.  Hmm... is that why my stomach hurst when I'm nervous?  Yes. 

...Anxioussness lead you to the bathroom?  Can't get over a mental block/fear in your mind + you have IBS?  

If you want to heal your mind/brain you have to heal your GUT!  

2b. Beware: the drugs and medications we take damage our entire gut ecosystem.  So THINK TWICE before taking drugs/meds next time!  Maybe try something else first.

Article: The brain gut connection

3. What you DO:
You didn't think I was going to leave the real bad guy out did you?  That would be satan.

Yes, I believe he plays a big part in this.  I can only speak for Americans since I am one, living in America.  And I believe that satan specifically has targeted us with busyness.  

For me, when I am busy, there is no room left for Jesus.  I don't think about Him. I don't talk to Him.  My life is not affected by Him.  I am focused on me & what I need to do & where I need to go. 

STOP.

Just stop. Think. Pray. Listen. Relax.  BE REFRESHED by the One who wants to refresh you! The Only One who truly can refresh you. He made you. He knows you.  He'll provide.  He'll provide the time.  He'll provide the answers. Whatever it is, He's got it under control.  It may look 100% different than what you thought it would be.  But trust me, His way is better.  So it's OK to let the Only One who is actually in control be in control.  God wants to heal you. He wants to be a part of every part of your life & in every minute because He loves you.  

It will be really hard to believe Truth if you don't know it, if you don't know Him. It will be really hard to figure out the best way to live life if you never know what the One who created life says about it.

What do you need to do slow down? To be refreshed?  

For my family we have found these things to be true...
... we need to say "no" to good things, sometimes great things (the bad things are usually easy to say no to).
... scheduling time with Jesus in our daily plans.
... scheduling working out (back to #2).
... not filling every minute of our day with a schedule!
... saying "yes" to fun things.
... inviting people into our home, our daily life - COMMUNITY!
... taking a Sabbath.  A real one. It's a command.

^{" 15} Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, ¹⁶ making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. ¹⁷ Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. ¹⁸ And do not get drunk with wine, for that isdebauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, ¹⁹ addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart,²⁰ giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, ²¹ submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ." Ephesians 5:15-21

Examine your life-- make the BEST use of your time, not just good use, the BEST.
Know/understand what God's will is for your life -- don't TRY to decide your own, it will fail, I promise (by the way, God makes His will pretty clear in scripture -- this simple word search can get you started)
Be filled with the Spirit -- cause that's the only way you can live the way God talks about, the way we are designed to.
Live in community-- one of the best ways God chooses to love us & teach us is through OTHERS.
Give thanks always-- a thankful heart can change your world, I also promise that.

When our bodies are healthy, our mind can think correctly.  Correct thinking comes from Jesus.  And that is why we need to slow down & choose to live our lives possibly very different from others.  When we think correctly, your heart can heal (I think its pretty stinking hard to heal your heart when your thinking is wrong).  I hope that you experience freedom from whatever it is that may be holding you down, healing where you are broken.

Jesus is our ultimate healer.  He can & will heal, He WILL redeem ALL things.  We just have to wait... 

Good things are worth waiting for... waiting with a thankful heart.

* Personal testimony to come.
* Products I use (now) to come.

How to talk to little girls.

{ my niece }

I just read this post & it is so lovely (based off this article).  After spending last few weeks with 3 little girls + some time with my niece + an evening at a wedding with 2 of Scott's little cousins, I was completely inspired!

The article is about how we tend to let the first words out of our mouths (if not our whole conversation) to little girls be addressing how beautiful they are-- their hair, eyes, smile, clothes, etc... And then we wonder why girls grow up obsessing over their looks & find it more valuable than anything else?! I know this is NOT what I want to communicate to these precious girls! 

I can't wait till the next time I get to see all of these lovely little ladies & have a real conversation with them about something other than their looks... even though they are beautiful!  I hope I can help each of them realize where their beauty really comes from!

"Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised"

  Proverbs 31:31

"Do not let your adorning be external -- the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear -- but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious." 1 Peter 3:3-4

* If you know a little girl, or think you may ever talk to one... READ THIS! *

{ freed to love & be loved }

Last night we had a beautiful evening-- it was our women's conference  for our summer project.  The theme was "Jesus girls: risking it all to follow our call" after a James Bond "Bond girls" theme.  It was so fun!  

 { the room before all the ladies arrived }

{ a few of the lovely ladies all dressed up }

We had 4 different talks on ways that that women had taken risks in an area in their life.  And I was given the opportunity to share about something that the Lord has taught me soo much about over the years- taking risks in friendships!  

It was my first time ever speaking in front of a group with a planned talk! (verse doing a panel, or just sharing from the hip, etc) We had to give it 4 times too!  Anyways, I recorded it so that I could critique myself (not fun!!) ...and I def realize how fast I talk! OOPS!!  TAKE A BREATH, KRISTEN!  So I feel really vulnerable about doing this... But... I LOVE what I was able to share, and was challenged to share it with you too!  So here it is! AH!!!  Feel free to take a listen (11 min).  It's not perfect, but it has changed my life & prayerfully maybe the Lord may use it in yours too!

{ Click here to listen }

baby steps.

A journal to financial peace by Dave Ramsey { found here }

Baby Steps:
1. $1,000 to start an emergency fund
2. Pay off all debt using the Debt Snowball
3. 3-6 months of expenses in savings
4. Invest 15% of household income into Roth IRAs and pre-tax retirement
5. College funding for children
6. Pay off home early
7. Build wealth and give!

the kind of woman I want to be.

I found this and thought it was so wonderful & just had to share it with you!  (I summarized it at the end)

{ The Proverbs 31 Woman }
10An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels. rare, precious 11The heart of her husband trusts in her, And he will have no lack of gain. trustworthy 12She does him good and not evil All the days of her life. kind	Her Character as a Wife
13She looks for wool and flax And works with her hands in delight. works joyfully 14She is like merchant ships; She brings her food from afar. goes extra mile to get choicest goods 15She rises also while it is still night And gives food to her household And portions to her maidens. disciplined 16She considers a field and buys it; From her earnings she plants a vineyard. enterprising, prudent with money 17She girds herself with strength And makes her arms strong. energetic 18She senses that her gain is good; Her lamp does not go out at night. good steward 19She stretches out her hands to the distaff, And her hands grasp the spindle. diligent	Her Devotion as a Homemaker
20She extends her hand to the poor, And she stretches out her hands to the needy. compassionate, generous	Her Generosity as a Neighbor
21She is not afraid of the snow for her household, For all her household are clothed with scarlet. provident 22She makes coverings for herself; Her clothing is fine linen and purple. elegant 23Her husband is known in the gates, When he sits among the elders of the land. influential 24She makes linen garments and sells them, And supplies belts to the tradesmen. industrious	Her Devotion as a Homemaker
25Strength and dignity are her clothing, And she smiles at the future. poised 26She opens her mouth in wisdom, And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. wise	Her Influence as a Teacher
27She looks well to the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness. manages her home 28Her children rise up and bless her; Her husband also, and he praises her, saying: praiseworthy 29"Many daughters have done nobly, But you excel them all." distinguished	Her Effectiveness as a Mother
30Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised. God-fearing 31Give her the product of her hands, And let her works praise her in the gates. honored	Her Excellence as a Person
~ Proverbs 31:10-31	{ found it here }

{ Her character as a wife }
rare, precious, trustworthy, kind

{ Her devotion as a homemaker }
works joyfully, goes the extra mile to get choicest goods, disciplined, enterprising, prudent (wise) with money, energetic, good steward, diligent, provident (wise), elegant, influential, industrious

{ Her generosity as a neighbor }
compassionate, generous

{ Her influence as a teacher }
poised (balanced- easy composure of manner), wise

{ Her effectiveness as a mother }
manages her home, praiseworthy, distinguished (excellence)

{ Her excellence as a person }
God-fearing, honored

{ photo from my date night this evening with Jesus }

Love, Jesus

I feel like Jesus is so sweet to speak to what my heart longs to hear... through chocolate :)

strength.

So I've been thinking a lot about strength lately.  I think because I feel so physically weak!  Carrying my big little boy up & down stairs & lugging our stroller & chairs & all we need to get through the day... I'm tired.


When I think of the opposite of strength, I obviously think of being weak.  And when I am weak, I am fearful.  I'm fearful... that I won't fit in, not having close friends, not being beautiful, not making a difference, missing out, not being pursued (by my hubs & by women friendships), that I'll be rushed through life, and well, just not being perfect!


What I desire... I desire to fit in, have close friends, be beautiful, make a difference, never miss out, be pursued, to slow down AND... to be perfect :) I know, I said it. But that's what I want. Perfection.


Why do I desire perfection?  Because God planted perfection in our hearts! Desire is a good thing! And to desire perfection is good.  But, only Jesus can fulfill that desire!  Only He is perfect.  (I need to remind myself of that every day!) 


So what do I do with all these desires that I have that lead me to being fearful?  


"The “desires” of the heart must be desires that are satisfied in more of God in more and more ways. If that were not the case, we would not truly be delighting in God as an end in itself but only using God to get what we enjoy more than what may be found in him alone." -John Piper via Sam Storms (emphasis mine)


OK, so I'm supposed to delight in God.  Check. Or... no check... do I really want to do it? Do I actually delight in Him more than these other things??


Delight is a command.
Delight (or  joy) is a feeling.


Few.  So I can obey & choose to delight.  But, it's also a feeling!!


I know how to delight in things.  Like I delight myself in chocolate by eating it. I delight myself in my husband by spending time with him. I delight myself in Westin by playing with him & making him laugh.  But how do we delight ourselves in God?  Sam Storms suggests 4 ways:

1. Intellectual fascination- Know Him!  I have this "thing" where honestly, I just don't really care that much about people I don't know.  But what's so sweet of the Lord is that within seconds of meeting someone... sometimes as quickly as hearing their name from their lips, my heart is filled with care & love for them. I desire to know them.  And to do that, I talk with them, spend time with them, get to know their personality & character- what makes them, them.  I think that's how it is with God.  To know Him, I need to engage my mind, & become intellectually fascinated with Him!

2. Aesthetic adoration- we are drawn to beauty & repelled by ugliness.  "God is ultimate Beauty.  To delight in Him is to behold His beauty in all its vast array." Look to Him for beauty.  Thank Him for His beautiful creation.  

3. Emotional exhilaration- our affections are also designed to find their focus & fulfillment in God- with the Spirit's help we must learn to cultivate & re-direct all affections so that they are rooted  in Him & riveted on Him- all of our zeal, love, devotion, delight, fear, passion, gratitude, hope, etc. I need an emotional makeover!!!

4. Volitional dedication- the engagement of our wills & the choices we make.  Obey His commandments & choose to avoid all He has prohibited. Obedience nourishes delight & joy.

So you might be thinking, "where is this really going? You're all over the place!"  Well, I might be, but I have a point.  

See, the root of my fears, the things I think I most desire.... they all tie into these 4 ways that we can delight ourselves in God!  The only One worthy of our desire!

Intellectual fascination- root: I desire to be known & to know others

Aesthetic adoration- root: I desire to be beautiful & to be surrounded by beautiful people

Emotional exhilaration- root: I desire to be loved & fulfilled

Volitional dedication- root: I desire my own way, to choose my own path

These fears that I have are because of my desires, desires that should be rooted & fulfilled in Christ.  

"For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control" 2 Timothy 1:7

Thank you, Jesus!  It is through Him, through His Spirit that I am able to be strong!  Strength comes from the Lord.  My desires can change.  They can change because of His Spirit inside me who gives me the ability to choose Him over all these other desires.  

Let me make this really clear...

I desire to... 

...fit in & have close friends ... The Lord is my strength to choose Him- to be so satisfied in Him that I am free to love & be loved by whomever He chooses.

...be beautiful ... The Lord is my strength to be so captivated by His beauty that I see myself as His beautiful creation that I am.

...make a difference ... The Lord is my strength to choose to live for Him & follow His ways so that my legacy lasts for eternity through the souls of man.

...never miss out ... The Lord is my strength to choose to follow the Spirit's leading in my heart so that I never miss out on what He wants me to do.

...be pursued ... The Lord is my strength to see Him as my ultimate pursuer & be satisfied in His passionate love for me.

...to slow down ... The Lord is my strength to stop & enjoy Him, His creation & His gifts.

...be perfect ... The Lord is my strength to look to Him & be satisfied in His perfection.

The Lord is who I desire.  The One I find my joy in.  The Lord is my strength.  I am strong because He has made me strong.

"The joy of the Lord is my strength" 
Nehemiah 8:10

fate or free will?

"Your life is made up of defining moments - random encounters, split-second decisions and unique

 connections that have led you to where you are today.  Are these events in your life

 predetermined by fate, or are they the result of you own free will?"  (found here)

This is the question asked by the upcoming film: The Adjustment Bureau (coming March 4)

You can submit your story & the world gets to vote if they believe it is fate or free will. Hmm...

Matt Damon & Emily Blunt (actors from the film) believe that it is both -- there are things in their life that they decided the fate of, and other things that they had no control over, but something or someone else did.

Who is in control?  That is the question.

In Christianity, we ask this same question - do I have a say?  Or is God the one that determines my every move?

What do you think?

¹ “At this my heart pounds 

   and leaps from its place. 

² Listen! Listen to the roar of his voice, 

 to the rumbling that comes from his mouth. 

³ He unleashes his lightning beneath the whole heaven 

and sends it to the ends of the earth. 

⁴ After that comes the sound of his roar; 

he thunders with his majestic voice. 

When his voice resounds, 

   he holds nothing back. 

⁵ God’s voice thunders in marvelous ways; 

he does great things beyond our understanding. 

⁶ He says to the snow, ‘Fall on the earth,’ 

 and to the rain shower, ‘Be a mighty downpour.’ 

⁷ So that everyone he has made may know his work, 

he stops all people from their labor.

⁸ The animals take cover; 

 they remain in their dens. 

⁹ The tempest comes out from its chamber, 

the cold from the driving winds. 

¹⁰ The breath of God produces ice, 

and the broad waters become frozen. 

¹¹ He loads the clouds with moisture; 

 he scatters his lightning through them. 

¹² At his direction they swirl around 

 over the face of the whole earth 

   to do whatever he commands them. 

¹³ He brings the clouds to punish people, 

or to water his earth and show his love.

 ¹⁴ “Listen to this, Job; 

   stop and consider God’s wonders. 

¹⁵ Do you know how God controls the clouds 

 and makes his lightning flash? 

¹⁶ Do you know how the clouds hang poised, 

 those wonders of him who has perfect knowledge? 

¹⁷ You who swelter in your clothes 

 when the land lies hushed under the south wind, 

¹⁸ can you join him in spreading out the skies, 

  hard as a mirror of cast bronze?

¹⁹ “Tell us what we should say to him; 

   we cannot draw up our case because of our darkness. 

²⁰ Should he be told that I want to speak? 

Would anyone ask to be swallowed up? 

²¹ Now no one can look at the sun, 

 bright as it is in the skies 

   after the wind has swept them clean. 

²² Out of the north he comes in golden splendor; 

 God comes in awesome majesty. 

²³ The Almighty is beyond our reach and exalted in power; 

in his justice and great righteousness, he does not oppress. 

²⁴ Therefore, people revere him, 

for does he not have regard for all the wise in heart?”

{ Job 37 }